It’s been more over three months since I came to New York and here I am in the middle of July, not knowing where I’m headed. Stuck with a sublet till the end of the month, and facing a drought of auditions, it’s time to reflect.

My experiences from this first batch of thirty-something auditions are a mix of aggravation and success. It took me a while to appreciate that callback for the ‘Chorus Line’ tour, which was a huge achievement considering I was only one month into auditions. Nevertheless, I learned that it takes more than just talent to jump over the fence.

After auditioning for the RENT tour and being called back to sing, I reached out to my friend Natalie, who used to work on the tour, and asked her if she could dredge up some feedback from the choreographer. When she finally managed to, I was surprised to hear that they were actually very pleased with me, but had no position to offer me. That gave me an insight on just how specific the craft of casting is. You’ve got to be just what they’re looking for, and you have absolutely no control over it. Another feedback I got was that the clothes I chose to wear for the audition looked like pajamas. I was thrilled to hear that feedback, as that bit of information actually felt like I have something practical to do about it.

Another thing I’ve noticed is the difference between perspectives. When I planned my first three months here, I was doing so from Israel, and had no idea what it would actually feel like to audition, or to live in this city, far away from family and friends. Making friends is no easy task here, and that goes for everything else I have to start here from scratch – which is pretty much everything else.

Now that I’m set on staying here though, I have to plan things differently, especially since these shows I’m trying to get in to don’t come whenever I need them to, but rather whenever I’m needed in them. That last statement requires two things – one is that I find a way for those producers to understand that it’s me they’re looking for, and two – I need to find a way to make a living until that happens.

This is no hopeful post, but it is real nonetheless. It would be lovely if a few months hence I’ll be looking back thinking how this was all part of a lesson I had to learn and how it all worked out for the best, but for now I can only have faith and hope for that.

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P.S – That sad picture of me is from my first payed gig, a while ago. Not all is bad, but I don’t want to ruin the dolefulness of this post.

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